The conversation

We are entangled
In our own soliloquy
Shhhhing.. the ocean
Bereft sometimes, often smitten
Just keep holding me tight,
for all my weak moments
Rest just the night

Absent Friends

"And I'm up while the dawn is breaking, even though my heart is aching. I should be drinking a toast to absent friends instead of these comedians."

Sometimes,
The warm feeling trickles down
The painful bliss, a shiny tinsel town
A silent hallway in my dreams
A lonely place full of screams

The absence of temperance
The sweetness of penance
I look in the mirror every passing day
The only missing thing is 'Sugar's absence

Mismatched Eternities

I am quixotic
I seek the ravine
A big beautiful escape
Rest, just the night

You dangle
You love, you are the blossom
A calm in this mind numbing chaos
Won't you just hold me tight?

We are entangled
in the midst of this eternal storm
Swinging our realities
to elude our miserable plight

Our fires are burning through the stones
The cacophony retreats, it shrieks
Cutting through the entrails of this cage
We sit here waiting to explode

Knowing that it would be alright!

Nothing but ripples

You say the sand
beneath your feet
is hot
You lie
for your grievance
is nothing
But a reflection of
water in desert
which turns to smoke

I am a fool
trying to walk
In a house with no floor
But I know
the debris are real

The pain is true
the wounds fresh
the darkness
the death
I know it's real

The promiseland is almost here
but my feelings
just sore
I maybe don't even
want to get there
anymore
The light at the end
is hope but fickle
All you created for me
was nothing but ripples

The inn

this is the lonliest bar in town
it cures loneliness
and depression
sometimes it cures suicide
but most of the times
it cures me from the agony of sobriety
and my life from the darkness of longevity

The Last Hangover

Everyone in their lives go through a phase when beauty means everything to them. Chasing butterflies makes whole world of sense, running after bees looks like the best sport and throwing stones in sad waters create ripples. Anxious crickets make terrible noises at night, their wails ricochets against each other, telling tales of barren nights and forgotten deeds.

One of those mornings while I was pursuing one of the red striped blue butterflies, I encountered an unwelcome surprise. Blocking the way was a horrible garden lizard. Filthy in nature, staring directly into my eyes, stripping me through. I froze in my strides, I watched how the most beautiful creature in my garden was  becoming pray to the most menacing devil around. Within seconds, there was no butterfly and the lizard had vanished somewhere in the bushes. My childhood was scarred beyond comprehension. I had sleepless nights thinking of the lizard, filled with dark memories of how he ruthlessly killed the pure butterfly.

By the time I got over the nightmare, I was already grown up. I didn't remember the dream, but I know there was a moment of sorrow engulfed deep within. But now I was beyond the trivial things like a butterfly and a garden lizard. Nights also lost their importance as I wouldn't go out to see the stars. I was a mess of moolah and ignorance. Holding myself in high-esteem. Laughing at the world.

When the war started, it was just rumors about the enemy striking any moment, but I was least bothered. I was sure, I would make it through, no matter what or how. I would visit the local saloon, stare at women. Their terrified faces amazed me. I would order another one of those gins that was the specialty of that place.

I tried to replay last night's events in my head but it was all blank. Where was I, what was I doing, who I was with. Nothing. Just Blank. and Darkness.

I remembered ordering my favorite gin, followed by a cab ride to the party. A few shots of tequila and I was shown to a table. Then some glasses of wine, the dance and then nothing. All I remembered was a loud noise, some sort of explosion and everything went black again. I closed my eyes again to focus on the events of last night but no success again. I put my glasses back on and I was horrified beyond imagination. Every single inch of my walls was occupied by lizards. I freaked out beyond imagination. So many lizards, making some distinct noise. They were all staring at me, stripping me through. The war had just gotten worse. It was me against a whole army. I couldn't move, couldn't breathe. All I managed was to close my eyes and hope that the world will be a better place once I open it.

Slowly and silently all of them started closing down on me. They were moving slowly towards me, in a horrific motion that almost made me numb. Then there was the leader, the biggest of them all. It had red eyes and a slithery tongue. Inching towards me slowly, my jaws jammed in horror and one last move and silence

Sunlight was filtering shallowly through the slits in the window. One of the rays was particularly vengeful towards me and was staring me straight. In the backdrop, coming back to life was playing in a twisted melancholy. My will to carry on sleeping was interrupted by a loud thud in the attic. Lazily and quite unwillingly I motivated to do a round up of what made the sound. And my efforts were vaporized in vain when I could not locate anything. it might have been the prolonged effect of the last night alcoholic endeavors. Back to my bed, I covered my eyes with the blanket and spat on the sun's face. The early morning dissolved into eerie silence broken randomly by birds outside.

The silence drifted me into a dream. There she was, she was all tears, all love. "I dont want to be a mom, I will never be a mom, we shall adopt kids. You would hate me once I become fat. I will be ugly and useless, you would hit me without reasons". And then she hugged me tightly, tigher than an affectionate hug, it was almost strangeling me. She was trying to strangle me; I put all my efforts to get her off me. And there she was, the leader of the lizards.

"wont you kiss me?"
"get off..what are you..?"
"Kiss me please. Dont hate me"

And there she was back again. I started crying. I kissed her like never before. I was trying to calm her. I kept hugging her till she slowly evaporated in my arms

I drank more, I drank till I passed out on the floor. When I woke up it was past dusk.I was shivering, I was paranoid. Something was around, something was stalking me. There were strange whispers outside. Was it another one of those practical jokes that my friends so often pulled on me? My panic led me to switch on all the lights in the room, the bathroom. Even the mantlepiece. I closed the curtains. Shut off the windows and just laid back on the armchair. I planned to keep myself awake the whole night to avoid whatever danger was lurking around me

There were gunshots being fired outside, random sounds of some explosion. Even my sense of security was going awry. There was a lizard on the wall. I took out my bat and smashed the creature. There was blood all over. The room was spluttered with small fragments of skin and meat. The head was nowhere to be seen. The enemy was defeated. The gunshots outside seized, there were no explosions. My eyes became heavy, this was going to be a long sleep. Something I had not had for ages. The war was over.

And then the biggest explosion I had ever heard

I woke up with a start. My head felt like a rock. I looked around, it was all white and gleaming. I had never felt so heavy before in my life, this had to be the worst hangover of them all. And then the picture became clearer. It was a hospital. There were people around me, they were all looking at me. Their eyes were sympathy and joy at the same time

I had lost my arms and legs

I was like a limbless lizard

I laughed and slept

2011-2012 SeasonPreview

Yet again the speculations are high and the beginning 2 weeks have been of great turbulence, both on and off the pitch. The longest running transfer saga of Fabregas returning to the ‘club he supported as a boy’, finally came to an end. The opening weekend marred by civil protests and riots in London and other areas of England haven’t really helped and its almost perturbing that Spurs haven’t played a single match despite first 2 weekends being over. Nevertheless, the season is in fact up and kicking and here are my predictions for the upcoming campaign.

Champions:

Man United: Can’t see anyone else tipping them off. Last season, despite being one of the weakest United sides of recent history, the comfort in which the title was eventually won, alarmed pundits all across about the dipping quality of English teams. United are still to forget the pain inflicted upon them by the great assembly of Players in Barcelona and the departure of old dogs such as Van der Sar, Neville and in particular Scholes has created a void which will take time to fill. Although the recent signings will try to put up a performance themselves but it won’t be easy at the Trafford. De Gea, Jones, Young, Cleverly and Welback will need to outperform themselves to be a United player. Schneider’s signing could be pivotal for the season. Still can’t see them matching Barca unless some real injection of talent comes. Easy league title but the Champions League Title will keep eluding them this year too.

Runner Up:

Chelsea: For all their oil based money, the blue half of Manchester will finally succumb to the huge expectations. Chelsea with a manager who is being compared to “the chosen one” himself looks a man with an intelligent head above his shoulders. Despite the rejection of Modric’s bid twice, Chelsea aren’t still out of the transfer market and with signing of Mata complete, Roman is still leaving his checkbook open for more spending. El Nino needs to hit form soon and the aging legs of Lampard and Terry will be put to test. Malouda, Kalou and Anelka have to prove their worth against the millions of Citeh. Semi Finals in UCL is on the cards if the last week of transfer market is taken care of. Will finish 2nd above city by 5 points.

3rd Place:
Manchester City: Being in the shadow of their neighbors has been a painful experience for the citeh, and the inflow of huge amount of Douche by the Emirates, they look poised to challenge for the tital. The addition of Aguero can be a killer blow for all the opponents and Tevez more or less looks likely to stay. Hence with a frontline of Tevez, Aguero, Dzeko, Ballotelli and the sure shot dispensable Bellamy, Adebayor and Roque, can make even Madrid eat their pants. Despite such a flattering strike force, the man they need to shine is Silva. Their aim of playing in the UCL has finally been fulfilled and they are going to be a serious title challenger but a post Christmas pressure will lead to an eventual slump and take them behind Chelsea in the table. The addition of Nasri might be a key factor and the Community Shield loss to United will ask questions about the strength in character.

4th Place:

Tottenham Hotspur: The last season proved to be a mixed affair with gigantic wins again both the Milan Giants followed by an almost average performance in domestic league. A lot will depend on whether Harry can keep Luka and get rid of squad players such as Krankjar and Crouch. Playing in UEFA Cup will make the season tiring. A domestic cup is also on the cards but besides that they will do wonders to finish in top 4. Diarra is on his way to the Lane while Adebayor signing is also reaching a conclusion. Besides that Harry has a good squad to shrug off the challenge from Pool and Wenger’s lads.

5th Place:

Liverpool: King Kenny’s reign has come at a cost of more than 100 million spending on Carroll, Suarez, Downing, Henderson, Adams, Enrique and Doni. But still they didn’t look much of a title challenger all weekend. Sunderland matched them at most fronts. The only consolation was Adams and Downing not fazed by the strong demands of home fans and Suarez continuing to be as brilliant as ever. Things might get better when Gerrard returns, but it still will be a lot of work to do before a team can be formed out of the squad. This is not the winning time but more of a rebuilding time. A league cup/ FA cup might come home for Anfielders. But they will remain knocked off their perch for some years to come

6th Place:

Arsenal: Perhaps the most disturbing season for Arsene Wenger awaits. Last year, their chase for 4 trophies vaporized within a month and this season the slump keeps continuing. With Fabregas finally making a move from a talismanic captain to a bench-warming role and Nasri almost sure to go for higher wages tournament being held in Man City, Wenger’s problems just keep growing. So much hush about buying Samba, Cahill, Jagielka bit nothing coming out of it. They have a severely depleted squad putting huge pressure on Walcott, Wilshire and Persie. Vermalean looks to be commanding but a serious need for his partner still awaits. More enforcement needed in attack too else top 4 may elude them for longer than just this season. The crowd has finally lost its faith and patience in Wenger who seems to be building a team for future for a very long time now. 6 years of dry spell hasn’t really helped.

7th, 8th and 9th:

Everton, Wolves and Villa: In no particular order. Calling Wolves a top 10 contender in itself a bold move but I can see them tipping off Villa and Everton in this particular run. Their last year survival was a miracle of some sort but they have really built strongly after that with good sums at disposal of Mic Mac. Everton as usual will be doing wonders against top teams with uncharacteristic defeats against the minnows and Villa need a lot of reshaping after departure of their 2 best players in Downing and Young. N’Zogbia seems to be a good buy though and Villa will be up there among top 10 throughout the season

10th, 11th, 12th and 13th:

Newcastle, Fulham, Stoke and West Brom: in no particular order:. Fulham are playing in Europe again and that might take a toll on the players. Despite having a good squad, they might just find it hard to go through the season with ease as they might have to play more than 14 games if their Europa run continues. Dempsey, Zamora, Johnson will have huge part to play. Coming to Newcastle, the departure of Enrique to Pool and Nolan to West Ham has left voids and the bad boy in good form – Barton isn’t really a toon lately but Newcastle have shown character, after a dismal season, they started brilliantly against Arsenal and a strong win against fierce rivals Sunderland has already got Ashley sipping more beers. Stoke again have been the best promoted team in last 5 seasons, their adventures in Europe telling the story of not just survival in top flight but how far they have come of age. In Pulis they have one of the best managers around. Their accolades also included an FA Cup final appearance and they will be back in their Britannia ‘Arena’. They are almost impossible to beat at home and a good away run might even see them breaking into top 10. Signing Shane Long was a shrewd move by Roy Hodgson who seems to relish the chance of upgrading mid table teams. He did it with Fulham and he is all set to do it with the Baggies. West Brom are going to be too good to fall into the relegation battle and a good run in a cup is expected. This campaign will mostly go into consolidation for Hodgson and 2 years down the line a consistent top 10 finish may be guaranteed but again this is EPL we are talking about.

14th, 15th, 16th and 17th:

Sunderland, Bolton, QPR and Norwich: Black Cats have lost perhaps their best young talent to Liverpool and this season will be a test of Bruce’s character. Though apparent lack of quality might hinder their progress. The departure of Bent to Villa has been a huge blow and signing of Brown, Oshea and Wickham might prove decisive. Should finish above Bolton though if Owen Coyle can get the best out of Davies, Taylor and Jussi then things may just change. If last season was any symptom then Bolton after losing 7 out of their last 9 league games were worst performers after Christmas except for Hammers. Not a lot of additions in the squad and seems like heading for narrow escape from the drop zone and a very dull season. QPR backed by huge sums of money did well to hold on to the Charismatic Taraabt and look a good outfit, though the opening day mauling by Bolton made a harsh welcome to the premiership life. Will be tough but they will stay up. They have more quality on the pitch compared to fellow promotion holders. Paul Lambert made a remarkable transformation at Norwich by getting them to the Premier League and looks focused enough to keep them there. Although in EPL your focus can be the last thing that can help you survive. They will have to fight till the last day of the championship to retain their league status but somehow I see them holding off the challenge from Wigan and survive

18th:

Wigan:

Wigan have stretched their luck too far and too often. A number of miraculous escapes on the final day of the season have seen them survive the top flight for a tad too long. This year I guess their luck has finally ran out. Martinez stayed but NZogbia didn’t and Cleverly went back to Manchester United, totally baptized. Rodallega and McCarthy will be crucial for them but somehow they will fall short this time round

19th:

Swansea City:

Brendan Rodgers has been one of the most prodigal coaches that the nation has seen for some time. Back to back promotions and now into the league through play offs. The Welsh team are living a dream. George Graham, Lita and Wayne Routledge will be the focus players who will need to give their best if the swans have any chance to stay in the top flight. Although in the end it might just prove a task too tough. They will be more like the Blackpools of last year, brave and lovable yet might slip down.

20th:

Blackburn Rovers:

Blackburn made a late escape last season as Steve Kean struggled throughout the latter half of the season. Little has happened this season except the flabbergasting rumors of Kaka, Ronaldinho and Robinho signing for them (Quite a Brazilian flavor for Indian owners). The departure of Jones to United was devastating. And if their defensive giant Samba is to leave, the final nail in the coffin will be stuck. Can’t see Steve Kean getting past Christmas without sacking. Might turn out one of the most horrific season ever for the once championship winners in times of Shearer.